Is Elegance Dead?

Audrey Hepburn (left, circa 1961). Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion (right, 2021)

Okay I’m going to ask you to try something for me…

Think of as many famous people from the past as you can that YOU see as elegant.

Ready close your eyes and think in 3…2…1

Audrey Hepburn, Grace Kelly, Frank Sinatra, Rita Hayworth, the list goes on… That wasn’t very hard, huh? Now do it again but for the current year…it suddenly becomes harder, right? What if I asked you to think of current celebrities that you deem as “trashy”? Without naming names directly on here, suddenly the list is endless, right?

Why is this? How have we gone from elegance being a societal virtue and something to strive for to simulating sexual acts on the stage of the Grammys earlier this year (thanks, Cardi B and Megan :/ )? Think about songs like “Put Your Head on My Shoulder” by Paul Anka or “I Get a Kick Out of You” by Frank Sinatra. Now, compare that to how men speak about women, or how women even speak about themselves, in today’s top hits.

Love seems to have been replaced with “Hook Up Culture”. A guy nervously approaching a girl for that magical first impression, that they’ll will share with their grandchildren, has been replaced by swiping left or right on dating apps and receiving a plethora of vulgar messages (seriously, stay off of those apps). I’ve personally scrolled through TikTok and have seen girls rant about how many sexual partners they have had (some in the hundreds) for millions to see. Is this what we want? No

Review: 'Bridgerton' Is a Sparkly Period Piece With a Difference - The New  York Times
Netflix hit: Bridgerton (2021)

Well, you’ve found this blog and the little community it will create! So, there’s hope! I think that, deep down, most people want a resurgence of elegance. Why do you think Bridgerton, despite the graphic sexual content in later episodes, was so successful? We want manners and morals again. We want to embrace our femininity like they do on the show. We want to live our lives and have our own duke (haha, get the reference?) approach us when the time is right, NOT by swiping on an app.

Catherine, Duchess of Cambridge (or Kate Middleton)- Probably the best example of elegance at the moment & a great role model.

Short answer? No, I don’t think elegance is dead. I think it’s very much alive, but is currently overshadowed by non-elegant, and oftentimes immoral, things. Why? Because those things are shocking, create buzz/scandal, and are interesting to talk about. However, when we have an influx of this of this “trashy” content, it starts to become the norm. We become desensitized to it.

Overall, we need to keep our standards high and have self-respect. It starts with us, as individuals. You’ve all heard a variation of the old saying, “in order to help others, we must first help ourselves”. This is true. In order to have a more, respectful, and elegant society- we must each work on becoming this ourselves, then lead by example. More on that tomorrow, xx.

  1. I really don’t find Kate that elegant but thank you for the post all the same.

  2. I very much agree with your conclusions, people need attention and think that having bad taste will cause admiration and…

4 thoughts on “Is Elegance Dead?

  1. I very much agree with your conclusions, people need attention and think that having bad taste will cause admiration and they’ll be in everyone’s mouth, but no; the reality is that no one cares, many women in the past were trashy and they didn’t catch the eye of anyone but to provoke disgust, and now that being trashy is an epidemic, it will not have any good or useful reaction from the people that surrounds them, it is even less important than ever, what has always caught the eye of people (for good or bad, either love or envy) is a beautiful elegant woman.

    And yeah, I hate when women can’t be called by any name when they are involved with hundreds of people because you’re hurting their feelings (just as syphilis hurt their brains); but of course we can be the target of disgust when we say we want to settle down as soon as possible and have a family and making fun of us is totally fine for everyone.

    Although I’d say that putting Kate as an example of elegance in our days isn’t the best option, she’s only following the parameters of the British royalty but her style isn’t stunningly classy and beautiful like Audrey’s or Grace Kelly’s, I feel like Kate is elegant in the level Jackie Kennedy was, compared to Marylin Monroe, demure dresses with fancy fabrics but some sort of emptiness, I’d put someone like Rachel McAdams instead (I don’t know her or her movies or anything, I just know her dressing style), look for example this dress, hairstyle, and makeup: https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.elle.com%2Fculture%2Fcelebrities%2Fg7504%2Frachel-mcadams-birthday%2F&psig=AOvVaw2yAKdoNC0PWgVSDL2xn4sM&ust=1626048455441000&source=images&cd=vfe&ved=0CAoQjRxqFwoTCJiGn9fc2fECFQAAAAAdAAAAABAD
    Actresses have the option of being trashy unlike members of the royalty or the government, and the fact that they decided to wear clothes that show good manners and taste is more valuable in my opinion. And yet again, leaving aside the dressing codes, the royal family is very strict when it comes to manners and morals, so we should take into consideration better examples of people who had the choice to be mean, promiscuous, and of not caring about their spouses and decided to be respectful and well mannered. Sorry I got too off track with the style thing, I like clothes haha

    Can you please talk sometime about how they have butchered the toys and clothes industry and how it is unacceptable to call someone out because of their promiscuous behavior but completely fine to say someone is ruining their life for wanting a normal household being a young adult? thank you ❤

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    1. Hi! Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts, and I enjoyed reading them! I agree that an elegant woman is what turns heads and creates a lasting impression. I think that I was speaking more in term of the trashiness that we see on tv being pushed for entertainment value, so much so, that it is tragically becoming the norm.

      I also agree that there’s a difference in being a royal vs. being a celebrity and celebrities certainly have a lot more leeway, great point! I, personally, just see Kate as a great role model, especially when it comes to her charitable work and remaining “above the fray” when it comes to drama, and trying to reunite her family (husband and brother in law).

      Ah, those are some very interesting topics, that I would love to cover! I will certainly find a way to soon! Thank you for the feedback and I hope to hear more from you! ♡

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    1. That’s totally fine! I would be interested to hear why you feel that way? Thank you for reading and I hope to hear more from you! ♡

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